It’s inevitable at this time of year. Up and down the wedding industry comes those oh too familiar rumblings through blog posts and tweets about work/life balance, wanting to spend more time with loved ones and needing some time off. As we near the end of the busy summer season, everyone is desperate for a break, a marathon of their favourite TV show and a bloody long lie in.
5. Making Time
But it shouldn’t just be when we realise we haven’t been doing it for a while that we stop and take stock. We need to constantly be setting time aside each and every day for our partner.
When you’ve been married for a while you can easily forget just how important spending quality time together is. It’s too damn easy to get into a routine and to not make the effort to step back, get away from your desk and make the time to reconnect. It can seem incredibly unromantic to have to schedule things like talking, dates and sex, but if they’re happening less and less often maybe it’s not such a bad idea after all.
And while we’re on the subject of sex, let’s not ever underestimate just how important it is. if you have differences in sexual preferences, desire or expectations it will eventually tear you apart. Make sure you’re taking about any issues around the subject before you get married. If you and your partner are unable to, or if your fiancé doesn’t see any real problem when you do, it should be a big red flag for the future of the relationship.
Gareth and I are huge fans of the date night. Wednesday night used to be ours. Like clockwork, every Wednesday evening we’d take ourselves out – sometimes to dinner and the cinema, others just drinking and dancing, but the important thing was that we did it every single week. No question. It was our time to disconnect from the everyday and just be together.
In recent months this has fallen to the wayside. I’ve been increasingly over-stretched with work and he’s constantly got other things he could be getting on with. Sure, we’ve been out to dinner and done things together but I am really missing those regular Wednesday date nights. So we’re making a pact to start them up again. If your date nights have been happening less and less frequently, for whatever reason, I’d like to encourage you to do so too.
You should never stop courting and dating, and never ever take your partner for granted. If you can’t remember the last time you got dressed up for each other, or when were last really excited to see them, do something about it. Never get lazy in your love. Strive to learn new things about each other and promise to fall in love again and again and again.
This is part five of my ten part Marriage Mantras series. Be sure to have a read of the previous articles in this series as well.